Monday, April 27, 2009

Wetness falling from sky

What is this? Could it be rain? My sister Maggie and I are very sleepy from this rain. Mom says it's good for the grass. I wouldn't know about that since Mom never lets me go outside because I like to climb the fence and sit on the top mocking her. She can't figure out how I do that without any front claws but, duh, I have powerful legs and can leap REALLY high in the air. How does she think I get all those flies. I am still a little peeved because Mom and Dad held us down last night to put anti-flea stuff on us. We HATE that and no amount of hissing, spitting or growling deters them.

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Mom speaks: Twilight Movie

Cats are so lucky. They don't have to watch excruciatingly bad movies whilst tweens parrot the dialog EXACTLY and squeal every time the lead hunk appears. Actually the tweeny dialong and squeals didn't bother me as much as the movie itself. Now sure I diss Twilight and its spawn pretty much every chance I get but I had NO idea a movie, which closely follows the book, could ever be this horrid. I mean, I've seen porn with better acting in it.

Now all the acting wasn't terrible, but much of it led the viewer into wondering why in the hell Bella and Edward would have fallen in love in the first place. He's repulsed, he's secretly attracted, he angsts, runs away, comes back and makes cryptic statements and then she makes statements that don't make sense. It's all doom and depression and saying don't be around me and then you're around all the time so I FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU ?!!!! Right. I thought love was about joy and lightness. Okay there's some brooding but mostly when the guy you like doesn't like you not says "I have to stay away from you" and then practically stalks you he's there so much.

And Carlisle the handsome, dashing doctor....yeah if he's a corpse. They did such a horrible job on him he's paler than an alien being with the large eyes. Like no one can tell there's something fishy with this guy?! Buy some bronzer Carlisle and join your fake family at slightly looking just un-tanned.

In the book when those vampires hit the sun they are all ethereal and glow nicely. In the movie Edward just looks like he's got a horrible skin condition. Not very attractive or sexy. Edward also has stupid hair.

Okay and really I am more of a "Team Jacob" person anyway but Jacob in this movie blends in with all the other generic Native Americans with exactly the same hair. Too stereotypical. All they needed was feathers woven in their hair to say "hey look at me I'm a native american see here's my feathers and long straight hair to prove it." Jacob in the book seems more modern to me. He wouldn't have hair from a bad 1950s western, he'd have long-ish hair but not down to his butt. More like shoulder length or something.

In fact, the police chief father Charlie was stereotypical too. He didn't really act or look like a police chief except for the cheesy 70s mustache he was sportin'. Cliche city baby.

Don't even get me started on Rosalie and Jasper. They don't blend(well none of the "teen" vampires blend) at school. They look like 30 year old yuppies who should be playing tennis at the club.

The only actor worth anything in this mess was Alice and James. They were the most realistic characters.

Saturday, April 11, 2009

Happy Sping! *

Happy Easter, whatever the hell that is. Mom says "Happy Jesus Zombie Day," again whatever the hell that is. Apparently it is all about eating eggs (which I don't like) and chocolate (which I don't like). Isn't there a holiday where we all eat canned cat food? Now that's a holiday I can get behind!

*see cakewrecks.com for explanation.

Monday, April 6, 2009

Cmon' with the new site already

Okay, so you've got this nifty brand spankin' new mysapl site. It's at least oh so much more lovely than the old site BUT....Is there a link to it from sanantonio.gov? No. Does it automatically pop up when you're on WiFi? No. Is there an automatic redirect from sanantonio.gov/library? No. Please fix this whenever possible. Thanks!